The Bleating Lum ,
Goats have no business making cheese, cows should just say " Its OK goats, we've got this". Cows already contribute about 96% of the worlds dairy produce, I'm sure they can squeeze out a little more if it saves us from goat curds.
For a start, have you seen what they eat? Tin cans, cardigans, old bicycles, anything....and they say their cheese tastes tart! Tart! It should be like licking a battery after eating all that junk.
But, there are about 1 billion goats in the world and they've been around for ages as small livestock. Incidentally, there is a class of livestock smaller than small livestock, microlivestock. Do you want to hazard a guess at what might be microlivestock? Well, I'll tell you, guinea pigs, rabbits and, get this, bees. None of them, as far as I know, are in the cheese business, bees make honey of course, but they're not squirting bee milk out their teeny bee teats for cheese, though if they did, their ad would probably have the tag line, Bees Cheese Please, a shameless rip off of the classic Beanz Meanz Heinz, also having a farm with fields full of grazing guinea pigs sounds fun doesnt it?
Also, boy goats act a bit strange when they get their horn on, to entice the ladies they think its a good idea to piss on their fore legs and face. Their face...... how even.....?
Now, back in the day I remember being on holiday with a young lady, and an unfortunate series of circumstances culminated in me taking a wizz on her open, but not yet unpacked suitcase in the middle of the night, now, let me tell you, if anything sets us apart from the goats, it's how we react to that kind of thing, I cant say she wasn't exciteable afterwards, but I don't remember her being particularly enticed for the following 10 days.
The 3rd most popular search result on Google when you type "Do goats.....is "Do goats float? That's a strange question, but I'm guessing its just a lame fishing expedition so someone can say " Well, whatever floats your goat" much as I've done just there, to shoehorn in that terrible joke.
I'm not saying goats should be made redundant, they have their uses after all, angora jumpers then you can eat them, scarcely believable but there is more goat meat eaten in the world by us lot than any other kind of meat, no wonder the cows are keen to corner the dairy market, but I'm just saying stop with the cheese already.
Lang may yer lum bleat.
Goats have no business making cheese, cows should just say " Its OK goats, we've got this". Cows already contribute about 96% of the worlds dairy produce, I'm sure they can squeeze out a little more if it saves us from goat curds.
For a start, have you seen what they eat? Tin cans, cardigans, old bicycles, anything....and they say their cheese tastes tart! Tart! It should be like licking a battery after eating all that junk.
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| A bumper crop of goats |
Also, boy goats act a bit strange when they get their horn on, to entice the ladies they think its a good idea to piss on their fore legs and face. Their face...... how even.....?
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| Why hello, is that....is that goats pee I smell on your face? |
Now, back in the day I remember being on holiday with a young lady, and an unfortunate series of circumstances culminated in me taking a wizz on her open, but not yet unpacked suitcase in the middle of the night, now, let me tell you, if anything sets us apart from the goats, it's how we react to that kind of thing, I cant say she wasn't exciteable afterwards, but I don't remember her being particularly enticed for the following 10 days.
The 3rd most popular search result on Google when you type "Do goats.....is "Do goats float? That's a strange question, but I'm guessing its just a lame fishing expedition so someone can say " Well, whatever floats your goat" much as I've done just there, to shoehorn in that terrible joke.
I'm not saying goats should be made redundant, they have their uses after all, angora jumpers then you can eat them, scarcely believable but there is more goat meat eaten in the world by us lot than any other kind of meat, no wonder the cows are keen to corner the dairy market, but I'm just saying stop with the cheese already.
Lang may yer lum bleat.
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